The Joys of Homeownership

My two year old buddy W is sick, which means instead of his usual run really fast or be passed out speeds, he’s just been passed out. With the older two at camp, it’s been a really quiet morning…I read the new issue of Rolling Stone that arrived yesterday (we don’t subscribe, but they’d like us to…I might, after today), and avoided laundry. Also reveled mightily in the fact that WE CAN DRINK OUR WATER AGAIN!

That’s right, the month of the House Plague culminated in a water main break that meant we had to boil water for 2 days. You weren’t sposed to wash your hands or dishes with it, although showering and laundry were OK. (Why? I know not.) I didn’t really get how big a deal water was till it was gone. No, seriously. It’s easy to take for granted: you turn on the faucet, it comes out.

We weren’t in the area that lost water pressure, either, so I had a hard time believing in the whole issue.
Me: (turning on the sink) There’s nothing wrong with this water. See? Clear.
Husband: They think there’s shit in that water.
Me:(Waving hand towards water) There’s no shit! Look at it!
Husband: No, they think sewage mixed with the drinking water.
Me:(Turning off water) Ohhhhhh. OK, nevermind. (Goes to boil more to wash stupid dishes.)

I did have alot of fun last night, after the advisory was lifted. I was washing the profusion of dishes that multiplied in the sink, when, at the bottom, I came across a dried up bowl of veggie chili. SO I put some water in it and started yelling, “Oh no! Poop water!” (11 year old was still awake, and now won’t drink the water. Shot myself in the foot.)

This month we’ve also:
Called exterminators for an army of super ants that will not be vanquished by baby powder, vinegar, and ant hotels. They crawl up and down our legs while playing Yahtzee. (Us, not them.)
Lost power off and on for hours at a time due to summer storms
Had AC finally die in the middle of a heat wave, AC guy couldn’t come for 2 days (Did you know you have to clean those air filter thingies? Now we do.)

And our front door was afflicted by a mysterious ailment that wouldn’t allow it to close all the way. So I took to kicking it shut whenever necessary, with a nice old school Charlie’s Angel style kick. But upon husband examination, turns out there was a screw protruding from the door, and every time I kicked it, it split the door along the side. Whoops.

Basically, it’s been tempting to wish myself back to my college apartment dwelling days when it was expected for there to be funky bugs all around, and moldy food. No one expected clean underwear, and it was OK to drink Jim Beam and milk for breakfast. Nice, low standards.

But as one mom in the camp pick-up line said yesterday, “What about those poor people in New Orleans? They had to boil their water for MONTHS.” And I remember when I was there in April, being driven to the airport, and I saw the piles of rubble where apartment buildings used to be. It was weird, as the French Quarter felt like it always does. But some parts…shiver.

SO I’ve had been a little, teeny, smidgen taste of what it would be like to have actual house problems. Bitching about QOL in MoCo is pretty spoiled. Today all is back to normal…till my freezer gives out. Please god no termites.

xoxo, L